Love Story Part 5: Happily Ever After

November 29th, 2008

“I barely slept the night before, due to excitement. 7:30 came too quickly, but I don't mind. I'm getting married today.

I eat a quick light breakfast before my sisters arrive to help get me ready. I am fortunate to have a talented sister as my stylist for the day.

My hair is ratted, hair sprayed, curled, then sprayed again.

Makeup is applied, but not too much. I want to look natural.

After several hours ... I am finally ready.

My best friend holds my hand as we drive to the temple. We are ready to get married. To be sealed for time and all eternity."

I have been feeling so incredibly blessed and lucky lately. I can't believe it's been 5 years already. 5 amazing years. 5 years that turned me into a mother, and made me appreciate my own. 5 years to discover my talents and build myself. And most importantly 5 years of getting closer and building my relationship with this guy.

Ryan is one of the hardest workers I know. I am so proud of all that he has accomplished and his ability to provide for and take care of our family.

He has turned into an amazing dad, spending time with both kids all day on his days off. He is their best friend, and remains mine as well.

Over the past 5 years, we have had our fair share of trials, but we have remained close, relying on each other to get through.

Five things I've learned about marriage over the last 5 years are:
1 - Service and sacrifice. Marriage takes a lot of selflessness. I have found countless times, when I'm having a bad day doing something for Ryan-as simple as making his lunch, or rubbing his feet, it makes me feel so much better. 

2 - Appreciation. I took for granted a lot of what my parents did for me as I was growing up. Ryan does a lot around the house and tries his best to have me come home to a clean home with dinner on the table after a long day of work, while having both kids. I try to tell him often that I really appreciate it and it definitely does not go unnoticed. This not only let's him know that I care, but it encourages him to continue to do it.

3 - Communication. Before we got married we would stay up late talking and texting every night. We talked constantly about everything. Communication is essential to every relationship. I know for me personally when I hold things back and keep them inside it just makes me angry. 

4 -  Time. I think the hardest times in our relationship have been when we let ourselves be distracted and we don't put time aside for each other. This is one I am still continuing to work on. With young kids it hard to get away and spend quality time together. I've been trying to limit the distractions I have, and I'm trying to be present when Ryan is home.

5 - Stay positive. With being an adult comes responsibility. Everyone has their own form of stress and problems. Work together, and keep each other positive to get through. It will pass eventually.

Love Story Part 4: the Proposal

As I said in my last post, after Ryan and I got back together our relationship got stronger and it wasn't long before we were pretty serious and were talking about marriage. We weren't really in a rush to get married, and we had talked about having a longer engagement.

Ryan worked at a game store in the mall at the time. The mall is pretty small and soon he got to know several people from other stores. Some of the people he got to know were some ladies from the jewelry store. I'd go visit him all the time and it wasn't long before I met a few of them myself.

Shortly after that I was trying on rings and had one picked out.

I obviously knew the proposal was coming, but I was completely surprised when it actually happened. We had gone to Olive Garden the night before and had leftover bread sticks and food that we brought home. One of our favorite things to do was walking at our favorite park (where we had our first kiss) and feeding the ducks. Ryan brought the bag with the bread sticks and hid the ring in there.

The park is gorgeous, has several ponds to walk around, a lot of trees and many ducks that will follow you around if they get any hint of you carrying food. 

We talked and enjoyed our little stroll as we walked to our 'spot'. The whole time I never caught on to what was about to happen. I don't even remember Ryan acting nervous or any different.

Finally we got to 'our spot', next to the tree where we had our first (real) kiss. And next thing I know Ryan is down on 1 knee. He had written me a beautiful poem that I wish I had. I immediately started crying, of course said "Yes!" followed by lots of hugs and kisses. We walked around the park a bit more in complete bliss and happiness.

Love story part 3: the breakup

Our relationship developed pretty quickly. We were together constantly and when we weren't together we were always talking or texting.

 

I got a lot of pressure from a lot of people that we were moving too fast. Although I didn't feel the same, it still weighed heavily on my mind.

 

I was over at a friends house and we were watching 'High School Musical 2'. The part when Troy and Gabriella break up came on and I ran to the bathroom in tears. I had to break up with Ryan.

 



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Other breakups have made me cry, but not like this. I think I cried almost nonstop until the next day. After other breakups I was sad, yet I knew I was doing the right thing. This was different. I felt so...unsettled, and I couldn't get the idea that I made the wrong decision out of my head.

 

My parents were out of town, so I had my best friend stay with me. The next day I still felt horrible and I was still an emotional wreck. Ryan texted me to ask if he could stop by to pick something up. I didn't want him to see me, but I said yes anyway.

 

I was reluctant to open the door when he got there, but I was able to compose myself enough to have a small conversation. I have no idea what we talked about, but somewhere in the middle I started crying again.

 

Of course he hugged me and I told him that I had made a mistake. I let other people pressure me, and I was wrong.

 

We decided to get back together. I still got questioned and pressured about our relationship, but our relationship got stronger and I knew we were meant to be together.

 

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Love Story Part 2: There's Something About Him

Even though we didn't talk a lot at the boat dance we exchanged numbers and ended up texting a bit the next day. There was another dance/party that we were planning on going to that night and we invited him to go with us. Lucky for us, he obliged and off we went.

That party wasn't nearly as fun as the boat dance. We hung out with friends, and my cousin that I only got to see once a year came with me. I don't think we were there for very long before we decided to leave and go hang out at a friend’s house. I'm sure he caught a glimpse of how weird we all were. Surprisingly that didn't scare him away.

Most of us were pretty flirty and I'm sure he enjoyed all of the attention. One point during the night I remember one of my friends cuddling with him as he laid on the couch. I love cuddling, but I had only ever cuddled with boyfriends. Never with a guy a had just met. That didn't stop me. I laid there with my hand on his chest, and it was that moment that I knew something was different about him, and that I was definitely attracted to him.

 

Over the next few days we texted a lot and hung out several times. Over the next week we became inseparable. We saw each other at least once a day everyday, and have ever since (minus 3 days when I was in Utah for my sisters wedding). 

 

Pictures from when we first started dating...we were so cute!!! 

 

Love Story Part 1: We meet

Summer 2007 was one of the best summers of my life. I was 18, and felt like I was on top of the world. My best friend and I decided to have as much fun as we could that summer. The summer started with my best friend, Rachel's boyfriend, and my close friend, leaving to serve a 2 year mission for the LDS church. Shortly after he left, Rachael, my little sister Kamry and I headed off on a road trip to Utah. 

 

During the trip we visited family, went to a church camp called 'Especially For Youth', and of course met and flirted with some boys. I wasn't looking for any boyfriends, but I didn't have anything against flirting. 

Sisters being weird

 

When we got home there were several fun dances for singles in the area we were exited to go to. The main one, and the one that would change my life forever was August 3rd in downtown Portland, on the Portland Spirit.

There's not a whole lot about the earlier part of that day that I remember. I do remember choosing my favorite jeans to wear along with my gray sequined shirt. I was giddy, and so excited to go dance, meet new people and have fun.

Finally the time arrived to leave for the dance. We had to drive around a bit to find parking, then we met up with everyone at the waterfront to board the boat. That's when I first saw him. He was wearing a red and grey hoodie with a weird white shirt covered in eyes (I still have it and sleep in it sometimes) and jeans. At first glance, I thought he was cute, but I didn't pay much attention to him most of the dance. The rest of the night is kind of a blur spent dancing and meeting a few new people. Near the end of the night I noticed he was sitting alone and he looked bored, so I asked him to dance. He wasted no time and turned me down-rude, I know! The sad part is he ended up dancing with my best friend instead.

This is the only picture I have of that night

Unfortunately the night had to end. We exchanged numbers with some of the people we met that night. His was one of the numbers I got...